I have been having trouble keeping my eyes open at work today as last night was another poor nights rest.
This time the cause of my failure to achieve a glorious slumber was not the slow determination of my ageing body, but the fact that I was attempting to sleep on a 4 inch wide strip of mattress. So why was I on this precipice, when I am the joint owner occupier of a generously proportioned king-size double bed?
We seem to have a slight problem in our household. When my son was a wee carpet crawler, he would wake in the morning calling for his Daddy, and I would bring him into our bed in the vain hope that I might get a few more minutes more precious moments sleep. A sort of toddler snooze button.
However, as he grew and no longer required a baby gate to
cage him in keep him from throwing himself down the stairs, it also paved the way for him to make his own way to our bedroom.
This I could live with, after all, it is quite a wonderful thing to have your 3 year old coming in and cuddling, besides I no longer had to get up to get him. This soon progressed to coming into our bed if he woke in the night.
But before too long there was his little sister to think of, so the early morning snuggle time was gone anyway. But now she is at the stage where she has free reign to roam about the house too, and seeing her big brothers example, has decided that our bed is the warmest and obviously the most popular place to be (What with Mrs Geek, the 2 kiddie winks and myself).
What’s more, gone are the days of having these little cuddly 3 year olds, we are now having to sleep alongside these massive children, with bony arms and pointy elbows.
The thing is, it has been a slow decent into this nocturnal farce, that we call bed time. This is not something that Mrs Geek or I have sought after. On the contrary, when ever one of us wakes to find our bed infested with munchkins, we escort them back to their own room (against much protest).
Unfortunately my kids are not so easily defeated; they have learnt the art of stealth. My 2 little ninjas make their way in without being noticed, more often than not and alas once in they are free to assassinate any chance I had of a proper nights sleep.
I have spent years getting used to sharing a bed, so I am used to getting the odd nudge here and there, causing me to “shove over” or “stop fidgeting” etc. Whilst disturbing me enough to get the point across, it does not cause me to wake up. It is how we adults learn to tolerate sharing a bed with each other.
Thus is born the scenario, where my children can manage to keep me from sleeping enough to actually be able to function, whilst not awakening me enough to get themselves
throttled escorted back to their room.
Something has to be done before the bump arrives to join the Melee. I think I’m going to get myself a pirate’s outfit and let the battle begin!